Life as it is

I’m sorry I’ve been so rubbish at blogging! I was signed off work for three weeks, and then was on ‘reduced hours’ for a week. I have now been back full time for two and a half weeks.
I’ve now been a lot less open with work. I can’t afford to miss any more. I’m so behind on rent and other bills it scares me.

My emotions have been all over the places.. But mainly just really down. I had a meeting with my care co last week, and she was as useless as usual, saying she was going to transfer me to another service, baring in mind I hadn’t seen the woman for 4months..
I’ve also had a meeting with housing to get me moved out of supported accommodation, which I’m really really nervous about, I don’t think I’m ready at all, but I can’t tell that to anyone, I’m trying to be functional.

I had a major panic yesterday, but I went to college, extremely late, and passed an assessment, with y teacher saying that he’s seen an improvement.. And today I went to work an hour early, I thought I was supposed I start at 8, but actually was only meant to be in at 9.. And didn’t leave till 6.. Yes.. Two hours late! I’m trying really hard to get through this.. I know I’m finally doing something for myself.. Something I’m meant to enjoy..
But I’m just not. I’m so incredibly unhappy. Just want to give up with everything.

Anyway, thank you for reading, and following, means a lot.